Review: ‘Hocus Pocus 2’ Is Just As Lazy And Boring As Its Predecessor

Debuting tomorrow on Disney+, Hocus Pocus 2 is almost exactly as bad as the first Hocus Pocus . That’s partially because it’s essentially the same movie. This makes sense.

The project only exists to entice adults who convinced themselves that the first wacky-witches kid-friendly horror comedy was ‘good, actually’ either when it debuted in the summer of 1993 or when they caught it on the Disney Channel or Freeform over the last decade or so. I get why some then-youngsters clung to the movie like glue. It was a slightly taboo and slightly edgy kid’s flick released amid a time when there was a much sharper divide between films for kids and kids for adults.

A PG-rated Disney flick with horny witches, horny teens and onscreen child murder was automatically a little novel. The critics were right in 1993, but I get the appeal. Hocus Pocus 2 is essentially the same movie.

They couldn’t even be bothered to have fun with the potential It -like premise of child-killing evil returning after 29 years. It has the same meandering, do-nothing/go-nowhere plot. Jen D’Angelo’s screenplay eventually involves the three-star baddies returning to life in modern times and again mostly standing around riffing with each other.

Their barbs and observations aren’t remotely funny, nor is their puzzling confusion over technology (like automatic doors and convenience stores) that existed in 1993. Like the original, this picture treats the mere idea of three campy-comic witches living in the modern world as inherently funny and entertaining. And because it’s a nostalgia-driven sequel, we get scenes of characters reprising beats and lines that were organic the first time but now are just checking off boxes.

The only redeeming quality this time is a few occasionally amusing ‘human’ characters. Sam Richardson is a naturally gifted and consistently funny comic actor (see also: Good Boys, Werewolves Within and Veep ), so it’s no surprise that he brings entertainment value as a gift shop owner with an unhealthy interest in the legend of the Sanderson sisters. While the characters are primarily non-entities, I was briefly amused by a dim-bulb boyfriend (Froy Gutierrez) who realizes, to his horror and shame, that his girlfriend’s friends didn’t take being called weird as a compliment.

And I will concede that I appreciated the role reversal of the popular girl (Lilia Buckingham) who feels ostracized from her previous peer group of less-popular kids (Whitney Peak and Belissa Escobedo). Otherwise, there’s no ‘there’ there, with (as expected) less explicit horror and no implicit lust making the film tame even by the standards of its predecessor. We used to be a country, etc.

, etc. Anne Fletcher (who helmed much better films like Step Up, The Proposal and 27 Dresses ) brings little to the table, although nobody wanted to use the protection of the IP to expand anyone’s horizons. It’s not like the first film was Kenny Ortega’s finest hour (that would be, offhand, Michael Jackson This Is It, High School Musical 3 or Descendants 2 ), but it was at least somewhat unique alongside the likes of Jurassic Park, The Firm and Rising Sun .

However, even 29 years ago, kids said, “To hell with this, let’s go see Free Willy again!” It’s an example of the Space Jam principle. In late 1996, Space Jam at least stood out as weird, quirky and unique alongside more conventional studio programmers like Ransom and Jerry Maguire . But now that every big film is essentially Space Jam , there’s no curve and thus no mercy.

Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker and Kathy Najimy reprise their roles as the murderous but not scary Sanderson sisters. That’s all there is to say about it, aside from an unearned climactic emotional beat. I’m annoyed at how the current streaming war has turned films that previously would have been direct-to-DVD (or VHS) irrelevancies into critical pieces in an industry-wide chess match.

Even Space Jam: A New Legacy , which became a must-succeed theatrical release amid a Covid-constrained summer movie season, had $150 million worth of top-shelf animation and production values. My son liked that one on its own terms, but he (and my other two kids) was bored silly by Hocus Pocus 2 . Hocus Pocus 2 is on par with a mediocre direct-to-VHS Disney animation sequel.

You’ll wish it were as good as Aladdin and t he King of Thieves or Cinderella III: A Twist in Time . .