The 6 best sex toys for couples in a long-distance relationship

When you buy through our links, Insider may earn an affiliate commission. Learn more. Lovense; We-Vibe; Satisfyer; Alyssa Powell/InsiderOne of the hardest things about being in a long-distance relationship is going without in-person sex with your partner.

 “When [couples] are long-distance, it can lead to frustrations and sexual build-up that shows in other parts of their relationship,” Nazanin Moali, Ph. D. , CST, clinical psychologist, and sex therapist, told Insider.

Incorporating products like Bluetooth-controllable vibrators into LTRs may help alleviate tensions and encourage greater intimacy and exploration, Moali added. As someone who’s been in a LTR for over three years, I agree. I’m also a professional sex toy reviewer, so getting intimate over FaceTime is a staple of my sex life; sex toys are almost always part of that process.

For this guide, I relied on my and my partner’s personal testing of dozens of Bluetooth-controlled sex toys. I prioritized toys that excel when used solo and with a partner, whether they’re across the room or across the globe. I’ve also included insight into how I test sex toys and answers to a few FAQs.

 Learn more about how Insider Reviews tests and researches health products. Here are the best sex toys for long-distance couples:Best wearable G-spot vibrator: Lovense Lush 3, $119 on LovenseThe Lovense Lush 3 vibrator provides intense G-spot stimulation that can be easily controlled via the intuitive app. Best panty vibrator: We-Vibe Moxie, $122.

55 on We-VibeThe We-Vibe Moxie vibrator stays anchored in your underwear via a built-in magnet so you can enjoy rumbly vibrations whether you’re walking around outside, out on a dinner date, or just hanging around at home. Best clitoral stimulator: Satisfyer Curvy 3+, $59. 95 on SatisfyerNo sex toy can truly replicate oral sex yet, but the Satisfyer Curvy 3+ stimulates the clitoris with rhythmic, Bluetooth-controllable pulsing, suction, and vibration that feels fairly close to “the real thing.

“Best stroker: Lovense Max 2, $99 on LovenseLovense’s Max 2 stroker feels incredibly close to penetrative sex, and its added vibration, suction, and remote-control functions further enhance long-distance penile pleasure. Best prostate vibrator: Lovense Edge 2, $99 on LovenseAdminister super-intense prostate and perineum stimulation from a distance with this powerful, app-controllable anal vibrator. Best DIY sex toy: Empire Labs Clone-a-Willy, $49.

95/Clone-a-Pussy Plus+, $89. 95 on Clone-a-WillyYour long-distance partner would probably appreciate owning a duplicate of your genitals that they can use while you’re away, and these clone kits create a silicone duplicate of a penis or vulva of your choice. Best wearable G-spot vibratorLovenseThe Lovense Lush 3 vibrator provides intense G-spot stimulation that can be easily controlled via the intuitive app.

Pros: Consistent connectivity, fast and responsive, powerful vibrations, intuitive in-app control panel, stimulates the G-spot well, relatively quiet, long control range, long battery life, waterproof, app widely available on different platformsCons: Provides barely any clitoral stimulation, hard to control without using the app, magnetic charger can be finickyLovense’s sex toys are beloved by the webcam performer community because they allow customers to control cam models’ pleasure from afar — and for the same reason, they work great for long-distance couples. The Lush 3 is the latest iteration of their wearable rechargeable vibrator, meant to be worn inside the vagina to stimulate the G-spot. It’s quiet enough to be used discreetly in public, though it works just as well in a private setting.

As with all the Lovense toys I tried for this guide, the Lush 3 is astonishingly responsive to any tapping, sliding, and adjusting my partner does using the Lovense Remote app. I can also control the toy myself using the same app (available for iPhone and Android, plus PC and Mac). It even works when I’m dozens of feet away from my phone, or in another room with the door closed.

You can use the app to “loop” vibration patterns you or your partner create, or just manually control the vibration with a slider in the app’s interface. In my experience, though the toy’s external “tail” does a good job of keeping the Lush 3 anchored inside, it provides barely any clitoral stimulation despite its clit-adjacent placement due to how thin and floppy it is. If you want clitoral pleasure alongside the intense G-spot vibration the Lush 3 provides, you’ll need to either press that external arm down manually or use another toy (or your hand) to do the job.

Best panty vibratorWe-Vibe Moxie vibratorThe We-Vibe Moxie vibrator stays anchored in your underwear via a built-in magnet so you can enjoy rumbly vibrations whether you’re walking around outside, out on a dinner date, or just hanging around at home. Pros: Powerful vibrations, clit-targeting contoured shape, strong magnet holds it in place well, waterproof, quiet, can be controlled via easy-to-use We-Connect app or the included remote, comes with an extra magnet in case you misplace oneCons: Doesn’t put pressure on the clitoris, connectivity not always reliable, requires you to wear underwear, may not work as well for larger bodiesPanty vibes — small vibrators worn inside your underwear — are great for long-distance couples who want to do discreet public play, or for casual titillation while doing other tasks like watching porn together or talking on the phone. The We-Vibe Moxie consists of a magnetic vibrator that goes inside your underwear and a small, matching magnet that goes on the outside, holding the toy firmly in place against your sensitive bits.

This puts it leagues ahead of other panty vibes that have to be strapped onto or tucked into underwear and tend to shift around a lot or even fall out. Moali added that many of her clients use a We-Vibe, as the brand is known for its long-distance toys. The Moxie specifically has powerful, rumbly vibrations that can be controlled via an included remote or We-Vibe’s app on iOS or Android.

The vibe has a slight “bump” on its inner portion that presses against your clit if your panties are tight enough — although, especially with looser-fitting underwear, it may not be as much clitoral pressure as some might prefer. For this reason, I think of this toy as more of a foreplay/teasing toy than a “finisher. “The reliability and responsiveness of We-Vibe toys are not quite as impressive as those of Lovense toys.

Some think body size can affect connectivity in Bluetooth vibrators (thicker thighs, bigger labia, etc), which may explain why I (a pear-shaped size-12 lady) usually experience at least one disconnection per session with the Moxie.  I still think the We-Vibe Moxie is the best pick in this category overall because of its excellent vibration quality, comfortable non-penetrative design, and super-secure magnet attachment system — but the Lovense Ferri is very similar (albeit less rumbly) and has a better reputation as far as connection consistency goes. Best clitoral stimulatorSatisfyerNo sex toy can truly replicate oral sex yet, but the Satisfyer Curvy 3+ stimulates the clitoris with rhythmic, Bluetooth-controllable pulsing, suction, and vibration that feels fairly close to “the real thing.

“Pros: Wide array of intensities and patterns, ergonomic shape, good connectivity, fast and responsive, waterproof, doubles as a vibrator, easy to control via app or buttons, can create custom patterns, built-in video call and encrypted messaging functionalities, affordableCons: Small mouth not ideal for larger clits, buzzy/surface-level vibration quality, long-distance control requires a video callIf you miss performing or receiving cunnilingus with your long-distance partner, the Satisfyer Curvy 3+ is a good stopgap. This toy uses rhythmic pulses of air to create clitoral sensations that feel like a mix between suction, vibration, and gentle tapping. It also features standard vibration — you can flip the toy around and use its “handle” as a vibrator on your clit or internally on your G-spot — but the vibrations are fairly surface-level and unimpactful (I preferred the air pulses).

The Curvy 3+ can be easily controlled with its three buttons during solo use or hooked up to the Satisfyer app for long-distance control. The connection between app and toy is responsive and reliable, so you can turn the power up and down as desired to create a relatively realistic, oral sex-esque experience (make sure to add lube to get the full effect). Annoyingly, you can’t take control of your partner’s toy in the app without initiating a video call at the same time; however, this can be a sexy addition or you can both turn off your video if you want.

The toy’s “mouth” is on the smaller side, and thus works best for small-to-medium clits. If you have a larger clit and/or prefer stimulation that focuses more on the top and sides of your clit than the tip, you may prefer the Curvy 2+, a very similar toy that has a wider mouth and allows for more of your clit to be stimulated at a time. Best strokerLovenseLovense’s Max 2 stroker feels incredibly close to penetrative sex, and its added vibration, suction, and remote-control functions further enhance long-distance penile pleasure.

Pros: Pleasurable ribbed texture, strong vibrations, suction functionality, can be used while holding it still or stroking it up and down, can be synced up with other Lovense toys, textured exterior allows for a good grip, relatively easy to clean, great battery life, app widely available on different platformsCons: Loud, expensive, porous elastomer material likely has a shorter lifespan than silicone, requires an erection, not many options for controlling contractions, can’t see into it from the outsideLovense’s ingenious stroker, the Max 2, combines pleasurable texture with powerful vibrations and rhythmic suction-based contractions. My partner (who has been lucky enough to test many toys for me during my sex toy reviewing career) says that this toy replicates the feeling of penetrative sex better than any other. The casing has a ribbed texture that makes it easy to hold even if your hands are covered in lube.

You can use the Max 2 as a solo stroker, controlling it with the on-device buttons, via the Lovense app, or just stroking it up and down manually. You can also give your long-distance partner control via the Lovense Remote app. The Max 2 can be synced up with other Lovense toys — either the Nora rabbit vibrator or another Max — to create a teledildonic experience that can feel highly intimate and realistic.

It’s also fairly easy to clean (super important to avoid mold developing). The only major distraction I’ve experienced while using this toy is its noise level — it’s rather loud, sometimes laughably so, but I can generally still hear my partner over it on the phone. Also, since it’s opaque this toy doesn’t offer as much visual excitement as, say, a see-through Fleshlight Ice toy, and it’s far pricier than a Fleshlight or other high-end stroker.

But I think the top-notch mechanical functionalities make it worth the extra cash. Best prostate vibratorLovenseAdminister super-intense prostate and perineum stimulation from a distance with this powerful, app-controllable anal vibrator. Pros: Powerful vibrations, excellent connectivity, fast and responsive, two separately controllable motors, adjustable angle, long Bluetooth range, waterproof, fairly quiet, great battery life, app widely available on different platformsCons: Might be uncomfortable for long-term wear, might be too large for some usersThis rechargeable anal vibrator has an internal motor that targets the prostate and an external motor that stimulates the perineum (the sensitive area between the testicles and the anus).

Both motors can be controlled separately by you or your partner using the Lovense Remote app; you can also create your own vibration patterns or even set the vibrations to sync up with music and other sounds. The Edge 2 is adjustable, so you can customize its angle to provide your preferred amount of prostate pressure. This feature also enables the toy to stay in place better than some of its competitors.

It’s waterproof and fairly quiet, so it can be taken into the shower or used discreetly in public places. My partner loves this toy and (uncharacteristically) can have hands-free orgasms from only prostate and perineum stimulation when we use it together. The impressive responsiveness of the connection between the app and the toy enables me to turn the vibrations up and down rapidly and rhythmically, creating a sensation that feels almost like anal sex.

Whether paired with penis/dildo stimulation or just used on its own, the Edge 2 is a great way to share the pleasures of anal play with a long-distance partner. Best DIY sex toyClone-a-WillyClone-a-WillyClone-a-Pussy Plus+Your long-distance partner would probably appreciate owning a duplicate of your genitals that they can use while you’re away, and these clone kits create a silicone duplicate of a penis or vulva of your choice. Pros: Fun, unique, creates a faithful copy, affordable, can easily order extra silicone/molding powder if you make a mistakeCons: Messy, requires speed and diligence, easy to make mistakes, vibrator not very strong, Clone-a-Willy requires that you maintain a full erection for at least two minutes, silicone formulation of dildo may be too firm for someOften, it’s not just general sex you miss in an LDR — it’s sex with your partner’s parts, specifically.

Empire Labs can help with its unique Clone-a-Willy and Clone-a-Pussy Plus+ products. These DIY kits contain everything you need to create an amazingly lifelike mold of your genitals and turn it into a usable silicone effigy. The Clone-a-Willy kit’s end result is a firm silicone dildo in the shape of your penis-of-choice.

It then has a not-particularly-strong, battery-operated vibrator wedged into its base to add some extra sensation during use.  The Clone-a-Pussy Plus+ kit allows you to make a silicone disc that captures all the folds and contours of your vulva-of-choice, which can then be attached to an included masturbation sleeve. (If you don’t need the sleeve and just want a visual representation of your vulva, you can get the kit sans stroker, which costs about $55 less.

) Both products are available in three different skin tones, as well as fun colors like hot pink. While these kits come with very detailed and helpful instructions, mistakes are easily made during “cloning,” so be sure to read the entire instructions page over at least twice times before starting. Maybe watch a video online of the process, too.

The process can get very messy; however, the trickiness of the kits is part of the fun and makes them feel like a silly, sexy science experiment to do with a partner, whether you’re in the same room or just on video chat. What else I consideredWhat I do recommend:Lovense Ferri ($99): This panty vibe is so similar to the We-Vibe Moxie that the one you’ll prefer is really just a matter of personal taste. I prefer the Moxie’s shape, elegant aesthetic, and rumblier vibrations, and I find its magnet stays put slightly better, but the Ferri is also excellent.

Fleshlight Go Torque Ice ($60): Fleshlights lack the high-tech vibrations, contractions, and Bluetooth compatibility of the Lovense Max 2, but this one is wonderfully see-through, making it a better pick for couples whose long-distance sexcapades include voyeurism and exhibitionism via Skype, FaceTime, etc. What I don’t recommend:We-Vibe Chorus ($190): This Bluetooth-controllable vibe is designed to be worn during penetrative sex, though it also works great for long-distance stimulation of the G-spot and clitoris. However, its connectivity just isn’t as reliable as it ought to be for a toy this expensive.

We-Vibe Ditto ($123): This vibrating butt plug is pricier than the Lovense Edge 2 and not as reliable, connection-wise. It’s also not as powerful, and not quite as comfortable. How I test sex toysLovense; We-Vibe; Satisfyer; Alyssa Powell/InsiderMy partner and I tested these toys together, on our own, and at a distance.

Here are the criteria we considered most important:Versatility: Most long-distance couples aren’t geographically separated all the time, so the best toys for LDRs are ones you can enjoy together no matter your whereabouts — or separately when having a self-pleasure session. Ease of use: With app-compatible toys, it’s important not only that the toy itself works well but also that the app is intuitive and reliable. My partner is an app developer, and thus an app nerd, but I am very much not — so we were able to check whether each of these toys’ accompanying apps was simple enough for a novice to use and streamlined enough not to annoy or limit a power user.

Fun: Simply controlling vibrations (or other sensations) is not always enough on its own to create a delightful, intimate long-distance sexual experience. All the sex toy apps we liked best have extra functions, like built-in video chat, customizable patterns, or sound sensitivity, so your sex can be just as playful and exploratory at a distance as it is when you’re together. FAQsWhat makes a good sex toy for long-distance couples?These three criteria should be your top priority when shopping for a new long-distance sex toy:Material: The sex toy industry is unregulated, so it’s up to consumers to do research and make sure they’re buying something safe and effective.

As per BadVibes. org, an organization that advocates for consumer safety in the sex toy industry, sex toys should be made of medical or food-grade material, be hypoallergenic, and safe for “intimate contact. ” That includes 100% silicone, glass, surgical steel, sealed ceramic, and medical-grade plastics.

Security: Pay attention to sex toy companies’ claims about the security and encryption functions of their accompanying apps. “Smart” sex toys have been linked to security breaches in the past, sometimes with terrifying results. Many companies implement state-of-the-art safety measures but look at a company’s FAQ on this topic if you’re unsure.

Controls: Look for toys that can be controlled both remotely and directly (i. e. with a control panel or button on the toy itself).

This can be helpful when you’re using the toy solo, or when you’re having tech problems or can’t access your phone for whatever reason. Does using sex toys in a long-distance relationship actually help?Studies show that “relationship maintenance behaviors” like texting about your day or reminiscing on fun memories together over the phone can increase couples’ satisfaction with their long-distance relationship. Distance-defying technologies can also be used to enhance your connection, whether it’s sexting or mutual masturbation, with or without toys, from across the country.

 “Many of my clients have a number of different remote-control [toys] they love,” Moali said, “but I think it’s important to also remember that these are props. Your interaction with your partner is the main dish. ” Read the original article on Insider.