International Men’s Day 2022: Let’s get into men’s world; they aren’t as privileged as it seems

The society has bifurcated roles, adjectives and emotions for both the genders men and women. Women are mainly the supporters and men the bread-winners, females are termed as beautiful and males as handsome; girls can be emotionally vulnerable whereas guys cannot. Do we even bother to ask men in our lives that are they facing any struggle or a challenge, living in the world when they are put in a box of expectations, not only by society but the family members as well.

Adding to it is the ongoing heinous crimes committed by some men of society, which not only bring disgust but also put every men under the radar of suspicion. Free Press Journal spoke to a few men of all age group to understand how it is to live in the times, when the world perceives them as trouble makers to society and the freedom of women. We all go through emotional ups and downs, while women comparatively are open about expressing their emotions, men on the other hand, men are expert in hiding their emotions even if at times they feel overwhelmed.

Sayak Adhikari, who works in a corporate firm in Bengaluru says, “We, men are expected to deal with anything that comes in our way and solve problems on our own. There have been instances when I shared my problems and how I was feeling but rather understanding, my family and friends blamed me for being the reason of my issues. ” Sayak also pointed out that in a family, no child sees a father expressing his mental turbulences or saying I am low today? Many a times, men also don’t speak about their emotions and issues knowing that their family is dependent on them and they cannot tell them their problems.

“We have so badly conditioned men that they have to bear the outcome of this which puts an added mental pressure on them. ” We asked how he deals with these situation. “I go into hibernation state and go inside my shell like a tortoise.

And when I finally come up with a solution to my problem, my acquaintances are not happy with that solution which becomes traumatic and the loop continues. I just feel that why can’t people support and guide when they know of a solution instead of always expecting us to be strong and not be vulnerable,” he shares. When a women earns, she is considered independent but for men it is a necessity.

Also, why is the societal pressure that the bread winner of the family, cannot express his heart out? A young entrepreneur Himanshu Goyal from Indore says, “Men are entitled for creating wealth. They are also expected to meet everyone’s expectations in the family and while they do so, they stop living their own life. ” He further says, “The most important criteria for men to get married is his financial status and when they go through a rough patch, they generally don’t express it and when they do, they don’t find the right listener.

” A most common problem for married guys is to balance situations between wife and mother so that none of them feels less important. Men do try their best to do so but often they get sandwiched between them. The situations sometimes go from bad to worst as the wife or mother vent their frustration at their husband and son which affects the mental peace of a man leaving him with his no ‘me’ time.

In a recent research, a section of men were asked about when they last time cried in public? Most men denied while a few men said they did but felt embarrassing. Reason? “It is because they are perceived as weak and told, ‘Stop crying like a girl. ‘ (again a stereotype for both genders),” Darshan Shah, a pharma professional in Ahmedabad.

We all have grown up listening to this idealistic ‘make your profession your occupation’ saying. But how many times does that work for men? Many men we spoke to shared that they had interests in culinary arts, dance, singing, or sports, however, after a point, no one supported the idea of pursuing any of these hobbies as professions. “Anything that doesn’t fit to the societal category is not regarded an ideal profession.

“Men are forced to choose engineering, medical or civil services which may have nothing to do with a man’s talent and passion. They always have the burden to manage their families throughout their life,” says Himanshu. In a corporate world, men are excepted to work for for longer hours than a woman.

In metropolitan cities, at many work places, girls are provided with conveyance facilities at night but guys are deprived of this facility. “I understand, women need more security than men, at least in today’s time when some men have really forgotten to be gentleman with women. But if we are employees of the same company, there should be an equal treatment,” says Sayak.

Let’s give men the space they require to express themselves, to open up their emotions, to pursue their passion and not judge them on their financial status. As much as women need men to accept them as they are, men also need to be celebrated the way they are unless they become unbearable, which could be both ways. .